Men, huh? Can't live with 'em. Can't strip 'em and spank 'em. Well actually, you CAN, in this little corner of cyberspace. Around here, fully grown males are at constant risk of humiliating bare bottomed correction - hence the 'humblings' of the title.

Friday 28 May 2010

What Is It About Spanking Art?

I like spanking photos. I like spanking stories. I like spanking videos (especially those old Nu West/ Leda ones in which merciless prototype soccer moms hairbrush their hubbies in grainy black and white).

But most of all, I like spanking art - making my own, looking at other people's, and then looking at it some more. Although Sardax is a personal favourite, I find I get a kick out of just about anybody's F/M work - even, and in fact sometimes particularly, where it wouldn't be regarded as technically great.

Hopefully, since you're in here, you also get something special out of the medium - and can help me figure out what it is that gives us that extra little frisson when we come across it.

I have some ideas, but I'm hoping you'll indulge me by letting me know yours first.
Do you have a special preference for artwork? If so, why do you think that is?

Sunday 16 May 2010

(Black and) Blue Landslide

Wow. The shock result from this particular election was that it attracted more votes in the first 24 hours than my previous poll managed over the course of a week! Either visitors have been particularly fired up by the topic, or - and this is my preferred explanation - more people are actively keeping an eye on the blog :). Either way, thanks so much for taking the time to place your virtual crosses.

So, to the results: it's a massive majority win for Tori Wright (Tory? Right? See what I did there?) So I guess we have a large number of true blue visitors, or the people like the paddle, or blondes really do get more votes. Coming a distant second is Lee Burr (Leeburr? No? Never mind). Now I had thought her steely glare might have put her on top, but I dunno. Maybe her long skirt didn't do her any favours.

And finally, trailing just behind, poor Libby Demme. I feel guilty about Libby because I didn't really think I'd done her justice. To paraphrase Jessica Rabbit, she's not a bad politician - she's just drawn that way. I did consider trying out my powers of spin by giving her an emergency makeover halfway through the week, but never got around to it. The other problem might be her weapon of choice. I'm a big fan of the strap, but it's a bit of a minority implement, isn't it?

Anyway, Ms Wright will soon be taking her place in the House, and the troublemakers in her constituency will be taking THEIR places over the paddling bench. Don't ask me how this local system of justice squares with the nationwide abolition of corporal punishment. I'm making this stuff up as I go.

Actually I do have another theory about Tori's popularity, which is that she subliminally evoked the image of a young and better looking Margaret Thatcher - regardless of her policies, the only Prime Minister to date who registers as a blip on my kink radar. In fact, wasn't there a comic song out years ago explaining her appeal in terms of her domina persona? Or was that just some dream I had?

Sunday 9 May 2010

The Politics of Spanking

So it seems that we can't even manage to run an election in the UK these days - hundreds of people were left still queueing outside the polling stations last Thursday evening when the clock struck ten and voting closed.

For the unfortunates who missed out on the day, I bring you Underling's Second Chance Election. Admittedly this is a very localised affair: all three ladies are standing in the little-known constituency of Pantsdown & Redbottom, where the hot political issue is the anti-social behaviour blighting the area.

Please be a good citizen and use your vote to decide who ought to be in charge. The poll's over there on the right. You can choose according to your party leanings, or which candidate you think is best equipped to do the job. For those of you who didn't get the result you wanted last week, this is also a chance to try your luck again. Best of all, you can vote from the comfort of your own home, there's no queueing, and polling is open for a whole seven days. Heck, you don't even need to be British to take part.

Now, I have tried hard to make this as like the real thing as possible. For one, there's little to choose between the candidates - all three are bringing similar policies to bear - and secondly, whatever the outcome, eventually the constituents are going to end up getting spanked. In fact whichever of these ladies is elected to parliament, I predict fewer safe seats all round!

Sunday 2 May 2010

Madeleine's Paddlin's - Actors Needed

Voice actors, that is. I want to make one or more short animated cartoons with a humorous tone and, you guessed it, an F/M D/D theme.My protagonists are Madeleine (she does the paddlin') and Scott (whose bottom gets hot :)).

I'm looking for a game gal and guy to voice these two. In my head they are American, but that needn't be the case. And while ideally this would
be a gig for people who already have some experience, I'm sure there are plenty of talented newbies out there. You need to be over 18, of course (and if you're not, what are you doing in here? Shoo!)
You also need the ability to speak some scripted dialogue in a natural style, and to make a good recording of your own voice to wav or mp3 which you'd then send back to me to work into the movie.

If you think you might like to give this a go, just fire off an email to the address in my profile and I'll send you the script to have a look at - maybe even a draft of the (silent!) movie if it's ready. By the way, we're not talking epic here - probably less than a minute long, and no more than 20 lines of dialogue.

OK, stuff I should make clear: this is for fun, and to promote the blog. I won't make any money from it, so I'm afraid nor will you! And while nobody needs to know your real name or face - including me - your vocal performance might of course end up anywhere on the web, so bear that in mind if you're the shy type. Still, if a friend or family member were to recognise your voice in a spanking movie, well - I guess they'd also have some explaining to do! :)