The Honest Truth...

...is that this is an emergency filler post, to avoid an ugly and accusing gap between May and July. I have been slack, haven't I?

It amazes me that I still get so many page views here when I don't post for weeks on end. So thank you, everyone, for continuing to stop by, and I promise things will pick up again.

I do actually have part two of 'Dinner And A Show' aaalmost ready to publish. So we'll be catching up with Jenny, Susan and the hapless Jeff in the next few days. I hope you'll find the new installment as deliciously squirmy to read as I did to write it!

Turning The Tables

I mentioned a while back that I'd like to try my hand at some work featuring female spankees.

Now F/M is of course my first love, and it's relatively easy to be successful in that field because there's not so much of it around. But I do also love to see or read about naughty young (and not so young) ladies getting their bottoms warmed, and I know from previous polls and comments that many of you do too.

Tempting as it is to post F/F and M/F pictures and stories here - if nothing else, I think it would increase the number of female visitors - I've always wanted to stay true to the original, male-subjugating ethos of Underling's Humblings.

So the obvious solution would be to run another blog alongside this one (listen to me, talking like I 'run' this one when I've barely managed to post once per month lately)!

Still, please let me know your thoughts. If you do want to see a sister site to this one where the fairer sex are on the receiving end, tell me what would make it worthwhile for you. I'm keen to do something a little different in an already busy space.

On the other hand if you think I'm already spreading myself too thin and should stick to what I know, tell me that too!

Step Right In

To: Underling
From: Wanda.Ling@OSIRISTechWorks.com
Subject: FoF! OMG!

How's it going, little bro? Nobody spanked at your office today? What a shame. A bit more encouragement for those guys on your development team - and maybe a hot bottom for you - and you might not have missed that deadline you were worried about. No such problems here at OSIRIS, of course. Funny how all of our projects come in on time, LOL!

Anyway, I know you're super keen to hear about how Frillies on Friday went. And it was a blast! Honestly, I've never seen so much pretty underwear on show, and all of it modelled by beautifully blushing men. We raised a ton of money and popped plenty of egos, so what's not to like?

There are some new nicknames floating around since the event too - you know I told you about Richard, the guy who'd been talking like he's God's gift to women? He's now answering to 'Dick Little'. Let's just say that pink stretch fabric fitted him much too well in front!

We actually had quite a bit of resistance this year - the girls tell me that there are always one or two of the men who think they can get out of it, but this time there were at least six or seven who turned up in their regular work wear. God knows what they thought was gonna happen - 'um, I've been told for weeks that I'm supposed to spend today in lingerie, but I thought it'd be ok if I just wore my suit as usual.' Think again, little man.

One of the recent recruits even tried shutting himself in the toilets - you can imagine how well that went down. I guess we did get a bit carried away, but my manager Sheila said he can pay to get the lock fixed out of his own salary since he shouldn't have been such a spoilsport in the first place. Anyway, needless to say none of these mini-rebellions lasted very long. There was some none-too-gentle help with stripping, some very enthusiastic penalty paddlings, and then of course the dressing up. For those who 'forgot' to bring their own, Sheila has a big box full of all kinds of gorgeous lingerie, and I think every bit of it got used at some point. Who'd have thought it'd be so much fun? Like having a living, life-size 'Sissy Barbie'. With realistic squirming action!

As for the toilet hideaway, we had to make an example of him of course - for his sins he's going to get pride of place on the cover of the OSIRISissies calendar, showing off his well-paddled behind in the little lace thong we finally put him in - that is, after we'd had him model a dozen other outfits. I'm not actually sure what made him blush more - parading for us in panties, or desperately trying to cover his cock during costume changes! I do know that he didn't take too well to having his bottom blistered, hence his new nickname - 'Sobbin' Robin'. Honestly, if he hadn't wanted us to give him such a hiding then he should have shown a bit more fundraising spirit from the outset. Some people are so uncharitable.

Anyway, that's all I have time for - just on my way out for a long lunch, and before I go I have to give William on my team a motivational spanking to make sure some paperwork is done by the time I get back. What can I say? It's tough work maintaining discipline, but somebody has to do it!

Love,

Wanda.

Now We Are One

On 5th April 2010, I fired up Underling's Humblings by pressing the big orange 'PUBLISH' button for the very first time.

Twelve months on from that first post, here we all are, if not quite hurtling through cyberspace then at least still trundling along and enjoying the view and the conversation.

So far the journey has been pretty leisurely - I've posted around twenty drawings and a handful of stories and animations, and picked up a quarter of a million page views and a hundred or so fellow travellers.

I've also struck up online friendships with regular readers, fellow bloggers and even a few spanking artists and writers whom I view with the kind of awe that other people bestow on rock stars.

It's been fun, and I hope it always will be. And since the people who make any blog are its visitors, then I wish all of you
many happy returns!

Now, clearly a spanking blog's birthday merits a birthday spanking for the blogger. Much as I'd love to receive one, sadly current internet technology doesn't allow them to be delivered online - maybe someone will fix that in time for next year.

Meanwhile, here's my virtual whipping boy waiting to be hairbrushed on my behalf (you'll need to go and get Flash Player if you can't see him).

Obviously this young man is super keen for his spanking to get under way, but before that can happen I need to figure out how many swats a year-old blog ought to invite. I think tradition says one swat per year plus one to grow on. But two swats isn't any kind of a spanking, is it?

Anyone have any suggestions?

Faster, Higher, Stronger, More Severe

An international outcry has greeted the Olympic Committee's last-minute decision to include competitive spanking at the London Games next year. Critics have said that the controversial move clearly panders to the host nation.

José Itentso of the Spanish delegation said, "It's like a bad joke, as if bullfighting had been added as an event just before the Barcelona Olympics. It's true some of us have a little prior spanking experience, but to the British it is pretty much a national sport. Not for nothing do they call it the English vice."

Hanna Zoff of Sweden, meanwhile, said: "as one of the first countries to ban corporal punishment we have been out of practice for decades. It's simply unfair that we should have to compete against a nation of perverts."

With the committee refusing to reverse its decision, athletes across the world have had little choice but to initiate emergency training programmes. Many of these are being led by coaches specially flown in from the UK.

To find out more, we visited the newly constructed 10,000-seat 'disciplinarium' in East London to catch up with the British hopefuls as they honed their skills. We found 23-year old Londoner Willy Givin face down across teammate Helen Highwater's knee - so it fell to her to do most of the talking.

"Competitive Spanking has been a minority sport until now," explained the pretty 24-year old while dishing out blows with a small but mean-looking wooden paddle. "But its elevation to Olympic status is sure to generate a surge of interest."

So what's 'competitive' about it?

"Well, events exist for a variety of implements across two main - if you'll pardon the pun - disciplines. The first is freestyle, in which points are awarded for technique, aesthetic appeal and creativity. I think Will would agree that I do most of the work there - his main contributions are vocal reactions and facial expressions. But our real speciality is mixed doubles, where teams of different nations swap partners and compete in a simultaneous face-to-face "paddle-off". It's one of very few events where 'beating the opposition' means exactly that. A team is eliminated as soon as its spankee submits and uses the safeword, so it really is a test of both of our abilities - mine to break the will of our opponents' spankee as fast as possible, and William's to withstand punishment from their spanker until I've managed to do it. That really gets the adrenaline flowing for both of us, I can tell you!"

Asked about their background in the sport, Helen admitted that they do have something of an advantage. "As a couple, we've been enthusiastic amateurs for a number of years," she explained. "But we will of course need to up our game now that we're spanking for Britain."

Nor are the team underestimating the competition. "There are some impressive players out there," Helen told us. "I hear the Japanese spankee is a veteran of 'endurance' TV shows and has incredible staying power. And Tanya Hyde of the US is an ex-discus champion, and has a fearsome arm."

So how does Helen rate their chances next year?

"Our preparation is going well. I can now paddle at full strength for hours at a time - and that's toughened Willy's resolve, not to mention his behind, to a medal-winning degree."

"I did suggest some - ouch! - cross-training," gasped her red-faced, red-bottomed partner. "But our coach says that because the pairings in competition are F/M only, she doesn't see any benefit in Helen being on the receiving end."

"And since our coach is a former national champion herself," added Helen, "Will knows better than to argue with her."

Despite the sport's slightly saucy reputation, officials say they will be taking it very seriously in its first Olympic year. In addition to some key rules - all male competitors to be bare below the waist, and only standard Olympic-grade implements to be used - there will be random tests of spankees for banned substances including anaesthetic gels and arnica cream.

The British disciplinary duo are equally serious in their ambition to mount the podium next summer. "We're hoping it won't be just the cyclists and swimmers winning gold medals on home turf," panted Will, finally released from his partner's lap. "But we know other teams are working hard to get in shape. So we have another fourteen months of rigorous training ahead of us!"

"Speaking of which," chided his eager partner, "that's enough of a breather - we've got medals to win. Over you go!"

Five Little Words

Some of you will remember a series of polls I ran back in July, inviting people to choose what they wanted to see in a new drawing. I really enjoyed that exercise, and I thought the resulting picture came out pretty well, but it was based on some seriously limited options.

I thought it'd be fun - and challenging - to really open up the field this time around. So for the next few days, I'm inviting brief suggestions from any visitor who wants to play. Is there an unusual implement, or a location, or an item of dress that you've always wanted to see in a spanking scene? Maybe you just have something wacky in mind that you just want to see if I can portray. Whatever it is, I'd like to hear it!

To try and keep some kind of grip, let's limit the suggestions to one idea per person, expressed in a maximum of five words. So 'mouth soaping' would qualify, as would 'spanking aliens from outer space'. But 'blonde woman in a green dress caning a man in striped pyjamas in a New York loft' would not. And I guess if you want to help me out (and why wouldn't you?) then you could scan through the comments before yours and try not to contradict them - for example, if someone's already provided a setting then you might like to consider some other aspect of the picture.

I reckon I'll draw a line - see what I did there? - when I've heard from ten people or so. For giggles, I'll then try to incorporate all your ideas into one drawing - hence the reason for keeping them simple. If it makes my brain hurt too much trying to squeeze them all in, I might spread them across several works (listen to me, talking like I churn one out every couple of days!)

Of course, I do want to keep everything within the spirit of the blog - that rules out depictions of anyone underaged, anything 'extreme' or gory, real people, and explicit sexual activity. Those are all the ground rules I can think of right now, but I may have to implement some emergency additions once the comments start coming in! ;)

For now, over to you... and feel free to be as creative, random and, well, challenging as you like!

In Case You Were Wondering...

...I haven't been a total slacker these last few weeks. If you take yourself over to 'All Mine', you'll find the drawing I did for my wickedly wonderful friend Suzanne, who owns that blog.

While you're there, take the time to say hello and browse the rest of her posts. Fans of sissying, cuckolding and just good old fashioned femdom spanking will find much to enjoy! Do pop back here and tell me if you like the picture, but if you want to reuse it anywhere please be sure to ask Suzanne's permission since I drew it specifically for her.

By the way, you'll notice that Suzanne posts pretty often. Her prolificness makes me look pretty lazy by comparison.

I guess I am a total slacker after all!